I love the thought of more coaching leaders out there. But I DO NOT enjoy the thought of more pseudo-coaching leaders.

Last week, I heard two stories from professional acquaintances …

One told me about her boss who said: “Can I ask you a coaching question? Why are you so upset about this?”

(Hardly a coaching question. Quite the opposite.)

The other told me about working with her mentor, hired to support her in a specialist field. Fine, of course. But in an effort to be a coach, the mentor would always begin with a long recap of the previous session; and continually conclude the current session with: “Have we done anything useful, here?”

(Recaps are to prove the coach’s own sense of worth to themselves. And as for “Have we done anything useful?” … the disguised intention there is to ask: “Was I any good, today?”.)

Coaching is more than rote technique and scripted questions. It is a way of being and relating that creates a special energy between coach and thinker.

A pseudo-coaching style, on the other hand, can be damaging.

Questions are powerful. They have an arresting quality. That is: they create in us an impulsive neurological need to focus on answering. If those questions are of mediocre quality, ill-intent or stem from one’s own performance anxiety, they will hamper, rather than help.

Questions shape performance.
Poor questions shape limitation. 🤔

I want to see more coaching leaders out there, not pseudo-coaching leaders. We must check our intent. Check our questions. And get high-quality feedback. Even the best coaches in the world work with a supervisor.

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If you’re a leader/manager looking to expand your leadership styles or are interested in bringing a coaching style of leadership to your company culture, message me and ask about my PERFORMANCE COACHING LEADER PATHWAY®.